My Travel Experiences

Call me Global!

2009-08-04T10:34:00.001-07:00

This is a rant in a what could be a barrage of rants that have been tormenting my head lately. The unfortunate part is always that when not written down immediately, they tend to vanish or change with time.

On of the frequent debates I have with myself concerns my identity, particularly, who I am in reference to geopolitical factors and boundaries, which very clearly also influence the cultural identity. Many of my friends have heard me complain at times about what I like to think of as a “lack of identity” and other times, they might have also heard me be proud of it and even called it a gift. Fact of the matter is, however, that whenever I am asked: “So, where are you from?” my head starts racing. Depending on the occassion, the length of the answer may vary, but truth be told, I am not comfortable saying “I'm from Canada,” because frankly, I have not been here that long to be a “true Canadian” (what is a “true Canadian anyways?). Similarly, I am not comfortable saying “I am a Paraguayan,” because once again, if I am honest with myself, I feel that having been absent from Paraguay for 7 years has changed me in some ways, added to my life experience, and frankly to my personal worldview: I am a different person now, am I really still only a Paraguayan? Of course if these two countries which have shaped me and my thinking most profoundly do not have enough pull to make me a true patriot of either, Switzerland lands even further down the list. And yet, as irony would have it, I was born a Swiss and up until 3 years ago I was only a “Swiss” if official citizenship has anything to say in this discussion. So I have developed what I like to call the Rafael Patent Answer to Questions about Origin or RPAQO for short. So when I am asked “where are you from?” I take a deep breath and then answer (speaking as quickly as possible so as to answer as efficiently as possible to such a banal question) “I was born in Switzerland, grew up in Paraguay and spend most of my life there, and for the last 7 [this is a variable of course] I have called Winnipeg, Manitoba my home” Pheww!

Now, what is most bothersome and for that reason also why the question of origin is so dreadful to me is that if people decide to care, even just a bit, the conversation does not end with my RPAQO. There are classics responses to tend to guess exactly which country if a citizen of then, which is kind of fun, because I can usually prove people wrong in their assumptions, which nonetheless will necessitate a extensive answer on my part as to why it is the way it is. Or then there are the “I care for you so much I want to know more” questions, which tend split into two camps: 1. The camp who desperately wants to know which country I “feel” I most belong to, which is not helpful, because my emotional attachments are to people rather then places and thus the list of countries I “belong” to is amplified in this question; or 2. The camp who is intensely interested in where you think you will live for the rest of your life, with a corollary of “do you think you will move back to Paraguay?” Unfortunately for both them and me, my answers to these questions tend to be belaboured and cryptic, which is unpleasing for questioner as well as labour-some for me.

It is only during this last month, while speaking to people at the Mennonite World Conference General Assembly (MWC from now on) that I realized some thinks about this. As I was answering the quetsion of where I was from with my oh so quick and efficient RPAQO I heard a most fascinating answer that I liked. The person who asked chuckled and then said “Wow, just call me 'global,' eh?” Just call me global, and indeed why not. A lot of things the MWC, the first one I ever attended, did not live up to my expectation. I guess one should not expect learning experiences such as you receive in University conferences from a huge conference that the MWC is, but one thing it did is that got me started thinking about spaciality and the artificial boundaries that we have put upon the spaces that we inhabit, and which we expect to transfer to who we are as people and how we interact with each other. Do not get me wrong, I think particular, local, and unique culture is important. However, to much have we associated culture, with borders, with lines drawn on a map. In CMU-speak, have we not flattened our world into rigid lines of detachment, that transfer to our lives and force us to conform what we are to something that is not alive, not encountering it in our world as much as on paper which forces us to put up institutions to follow it. In other words, do I have to be either Canadian, Swiss or Paraguayan to have a full and valuable identity. The answer is fairly simple and yet true. You see, at the MWC 6000 people of different tribes, nations and countries came together, celebrating not their national heritage, but rather their oneness in a world that tends to be so fragmented and that puts so much value on territorial, political and personal sovereignty that it has made everyone else the other in order to be self.

And yet by meeting together as 6000 people believing in one God, his son Jesus Christ and confessing the same faith we were proclaiming that these fragmentations, these borders are not what the world is supposed to look like, but that it is a product of the fallenness of this world, the product of the initial separation between humans and what completes, namely God. And through God's gift of salvation, things have changed:

Ephesians 2
But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. For he is our peace; in his flesh he has made both groups into one and has broken down the dividing wall, that is, the hostility between us. He has abolished the law with its commandments and ordinances, that he might create in himself one new humanity in place of the tow, thus making peace... So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are citizens with the saints and also members of the household of God.

At MWC 2009 6000 people came together as one, worshipping the same God in the same faith, in unity but not in homogeneity. It is that particular lack of imagination that our bordered world offers us that requires of us to the same if we are in unity, that just cannot imagine a world of oneness even in difference. And yet, that it was God calls us to, that is the gift of our creator that he has made us unique, some as Paraguayans others as Kenyans, and yet others as Canadians. And he has also made the floaters and in all of there is an uniqueness that reflects the oneness of our God, his image so manifoldly displayed in this world that refuses to be homogenous. So we came together as 6000 Christian Anabaptists worshipping, celebrating our oneness in God and our diversity as people of different cultures, that live lives in different ways and that relate to our God in varied ways and even sometimes understanding him in different ways then others. We came together knowing that God was there and that this diversity is his gift to us, a reflection of that God in us and a proclamation of his power to draw together those far and near into one body that transcends and ruptures the artificial boundaries or our wold and challenges the Kingdoms who want to break us apart. So please, call me what you want, ask me where I am from, because its true: I AM GLOBAL and so is our God, and so is our faith.

1. Corinthians 12:12-13
For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many are one body, so it is with Christ. For in the one Spirit we were all baptized into one body – Jews or Greeks, slaves or free – and we were all made to drink of one Spirit.

Its been a while.

2009-03-23T10:53:00.000-07:00

Dear diary, its been a while since I have written... Just kidding, that is definitely not my style. But it’s been a long time since I have updated this blog and I figured it was about time. Life has been busy and good. February, traditionally the hardest month of winter anyways (I think most Winnipeggers will agree with that) played it's game with us as we received snow and it was cold, which made our working conditions tough and really made us appreciate warmth so much when we could get it. And even though we spent much of our time complaining about "work,” it has steadily grown to become an aspect of my life that I cherish. Not being able to go to work as happened a couple of weeks ago, really threw a wrench into our routine, which was at first tough to handle. So work has been tough, it’s been rough, it’s been tiring and wearying and yet it has become a part of my existence here that I would trade for no other.

This last week we had the opportunity to go to Bad Reichenhall in Bavaria for a week of sightseeing, getting to know new folks and visit old friends (for me at least). We went to two bible-studies, taught a full day of English and sung, prayed and preached with and for the congregation. It was a real blessing. I was reading a book today that was speaking of the loneliness of people, a theme that I have mentioned several times in this blog. It seems that wherever you go there are people who are longing to speak, to share and to be heard. We spent a good amount of time doing that. It has been interesting to see why God does the things he does. We were requested by the Bad Reichenhall congregation, and so were sent by the Pritzkau's. We had our plans, our hopes, and what we knew to be our strengths and also our weaknesses. But all that God needs is us. How marvellous and wonderful to see and to reflect in hindsight on the reason why God wanted us there. It was to listen and to share our life with someone else. God needed us the way

we were and through that impact one person and encourage her. We had fun, we loved the mountains, but God had his own plan all along.

And while I reflect on that experience I cannot but think to the one thing, which seems to permeate every step that we take here in Germany: being confronted with the recent history of that country. While we slept, ate, walked, drove and admired the absolute beauty of this countryside and the friendliness of the people and the openness of the hearts we also had to realize the dark history of that countryside. We spent three hours in a Nazi Documentation Centre, set up on the same hillsides where once Hitler forcefully introduced himself into, taking ownership of all surroundings and creating a massive complex of houses and people to underscore, protect and inflate his massive ego. We read and heard about the vast details of the rise and fall of one Man, who shaped this countries history, to the point of robbing it of the history it had to that point, robbing it's hope and its religion. There is no point of trying to regurgitate what I learned and saw, but I want to leave you with one thing:

At this museum, so well documented that it was blunt, I realized the successes that Hitler had was not a nations fault, it was not the "German's" who were responsible. Rather, as I read and listened, one thing started gnawing into me: The fact that Hitler was able to enact a perfect symphony of ideas, thoughts and images that took over and usurped the long tradition of this country - religion! It was an act, it was a theatre, it was a beautifully orchestrated piece of fine art but above all, it happened not by chance but it was planned. Hitler, the man became a cult long before he became the emblem of the Nazi Arian state. Hitler became a god, not by chance but because he knew what he had to do, what the people wanted and what they reacted to. You might not understand my surprise, but it is know for the first time that I really understand Bonhoeffer and his critique of the church. How is it possible for one man to become deified in such a way that he could kill millions with the approval and adulation of so many people who cannot possibly be called evil all-together. Because although people were religious they had not a faith. Because the church, God's way of acting and enacting his kingdom had already failed. Were the church was not able to bring hope anymore, but only religion, only tradition, Hitler was able to take centre stage, readily conceded to him by the major churches of this country. And in a sick and fateful twist, when Hitler turned out to be nothing but a demagogue, but just another fake, he took with him the pieces of hope, trust and pride of a people and a nation. With that one bullet, he took with him the rich history of this country, the history of growth, of innovation, of proud tradition and deep faith, and replaced it with a history of millions of death's, 40 years of occupation and a hopelessness, a fatalism, a loneliness that can be seen everywhere and that is so hard to combat.

++ Picture explanation: Lonely people with nothing else to do.++

Finally an update.

2009-01-22T10:09:00.000-08:00

There he is. Just another man standing in-front of one of the countless grocery stores, the innumerable kiosks and Doner shops. Just part of the scenery, receding almost into the façade of Berlin, just another face, another life that we pass by each day. And yet, one wonders. What’s going on behind that face? What kind of life is that of just standing there all day, with the alcoholic beverage of preference in ones hand, the whole, long day? What choices were made, what circumstances pushed this man to just stand, drink, sell smuggled cigarettes. One wonders; I wonder!

He seems to be faithful representation of the inner struggle of Berlin, making visible what goes on beyond many closed doors, and shut windows: solitude, idleness, hopelessness and alcohol. It is that particular characteristic of these old Soviet style buildings that although painted yellow and bright they appear grey, a scenery that in an ironic twist on Marx seems underscores the alienation from life, from hope, from others, from God I feel when one encounters people, when one looks into their eyes and sees what they are so desperately trying to hide. But why care? Don’t people pass us by everyday? They are just somebody, anybody!! I have my own problems to deal with.

And then there’s Daniel, who lives alone with his mom. He is 12 years old, a 6th grader. His mom comes home from work at 10 P.M. He spends his afternoon in-front of his TV. Don’t even bother consulting the T.V. Guide, he knows what is playing on his favourite channels at what times, down to the exact minute. It’s all planned out, and yet, after meeting us once he comes to hang out on construction in the afternoon. As I start talking to him, I notice that he does funny things, is always on the move. He tells me that he has twitches he cannot control: “They are annoying, but I have learned to live with them.” Oh well, after all it’s the inside that counts not the outside, right? The answer: “Yea, I guess.”

Why care? The answer is simple. Because God does. Because when I see that man in front of that store, I can’t help but seeing Jesus stand there with him in the cold. Because when I look into the eyes of that stranger passing me by, I cannot help but feel that Jesus is looking into those same eyes with all the care of the world. Because when I see Daniel twitch and twist, I see Jesus twisting and twitching with him. Maybe this seems a tad too cliché, a picture a bit too poignant, to affective for us.

And now faith, hope and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love.
1. Cor. 13.13

And yet, what would happen, if instead of praying for these people, I would pray that God would give me enough love to stand with that man, to look at those eyes the way he does, or to twist and shake with Daniel? It is my prayer that God would grant me enough love to live life with other, rather than in front of others to be with, rather than to be for, and to give everything to them, rather then just providing an example.

If I speak in the tongues of mortals and of angels, but to not have love, I am but a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
1. Cor. 13.1

My Grandma

2008-12-16T12:17:00.000-08:00

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. Psalm 23:1

Well, I have spent the better part of the last 5 days travelling. Starting in Berlin, I have been in Basel, Switzerland and surrounding areas, back to Berlin, then to Bad Reichenhall in Bavaria, followed by another day in Basel, and now I am sitting on an Intercity Express Train that will bring me back to Berlin. These 7 hours on the train will be the most relaxing time I have had lately, but its been worth it. I want to take this opportunity to write something about my Grandma:

My Grandma was named Suzanne Widmer-Rychen, but to me and my brother she was and will always be Mamama. Mamama was a kind-hearted, happy, energetic woman of God who very clearly loved us Grandchildren from the depths of her heart. I grew up in Paraguay and thus was only able to see her every three years. We stayed at Mamama’s and Papapa’s house every single time we came, until they moved to a care home. I fondly remember the memories of their house, and living with my Grandparents. The children’s room was only accessible through the room of the Grandparents and often before going to sleep we would stop by their beds to chat for a while and to get a good-night kiss.

It was always, always clear that nothing would be amiss when we would come. Months before, Mamama would be baking all sorts of delicious pastries and cakes, that she would freeze and then bring to perfection for the conclusion of one her delicious meals. There was always, always food on our plates and whatever Mamama could do for us she would. You might say that that is normal for a grandparent to do that for their grandchildren who live far away, and yet, this experience reverberates through so many stories that I have heard from people all over the world that have stayed and have come to visit my grandparents. It was Mamamas gift and passion to serve others in any way possible, something she took with her even to the care home, where she would phone everybody she knew on their birthday to congratulate them. Up to the last moments in her life she was still thinking of a letter she wanted to send out, and a phone call she had to make. In her last conversations with one of her great-grandchildren she lamented the fact that she had no chocolate to give away this time. This was two days before her eventual passing away.

There are so many things she would do and say that demonstrated her love for us grandchildren, and I wont tell them here. What always impacted me is that all of these things did not come by its own, but they were a reflection of her deep relationship with her saviour, God. She loved God, and experienced his love in many troubled times in her life. This love did not permit here sit idly, but she served in the church and outside of it wherever she could. Although she told me many times that it had been hard for her that my mom was living so far away, you could hear in her tone of voice and see in her words that she was still happy, because she knew that my parents were serving the same God that she was, just in a different part of the world, and that was sufficient for her. Mamama and Papapa were prayer warriors that always relied on God. In these last couple of years, there was not one conversation with Mamam, in which the topic of her and my faith did not come up. As the grandparents got older, they knew where they were heading to, and they were looking forward to leaving this earthly life at some point or other. One of the particular stories that I remember very vividly is this one:

Several years ago, when we still stayed at their house for a summer, we had made plans with my aunt that Mamama had not known about. Now, in Basel, there is a shopping centre called the Shopping-Paradise where we would often go with Mamama (as a matter of fact this had become a tradition at that point already). As my brother and I were getting ready to leave the house Mamama poped in and blurted: “Do you guys want to go to Paradise today?” My brother and I looked at each other, because what we had understood her asking us was wether we wanted to go to heaven with them that day. I finally carefully ventured an answer: “Well, Mamama, sure eventually, but today, I am don’t really think we are ready.” Disappointment and confused looks followed, until we had finally realized that what she had done was to invite us to the Shopping-Paradise, not to be confused with the paradise that is promised to us when we go to heaven. We had a good laugh, and I will always remember this experience.

In the following years, Mamama would often tell me, however, that she was now ready to go to that heavenly paradise. She had to be patient however, which became harder and harder to do once Papapa passed away in 2005. Everyday that I would see her during the brief visits in 2006 she would let me know with hope in her voice, that she might not be there anymore the next time I would visit her. And yet, she never gave up. She loved life and she waited patiently for God to end it at his bidding and not at hers. She knew where she was going and she understood it to be God’s mercy when that time would come.

Two weeks ago, her condition worsened and I booked a flight from Berlin to Basel planning to most likely be attending her funeral. What do you know that by the time I arrived she had been better for two days and was able to eat, drink and even speak to us. Even though her voice was cracking and I could not speak loud and clear enough for her to understand everything, we had a conversation about the favourite topic of hers, that of her faith. She undersood every word I said and her face lit up, and I still remember the last clear words she told me that day as she was holding my hand with one of hers and caressing my arm with her other: “My time is in his hands.” And so it was. On Thursday she spent the whole day sleeping restfully by the grace of God who finally gave her rest, and early in the morning on Friday, the 12th of December 2008 the God whom she faithfully trusted to the very end and whom she knew to be the only true, almighty, all-knowing, merciful and loving Father decided that it was time for Mamama to leave her earthly life and body and enter a new one. Many of her loved ones have preceded her, including her husband Pierre Widmer (Papapa) and her second daughter Jeanne (at the age of 8 months). One of the Bible verses she requested to be read, a couple of days before her passing are these words from Psalm 107:

O give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; for his steadfast love endures forever. Let the redeemed say so, those he redeemed from trouble and gathered in from the lands, from the east and from the west from the north and from the south.

With all my love Mamama: Good-bye for the last time. Thank you for all the prayers, your love, and your example. I will always cherish my memories of you and I will miss you. I am happy for you and I do hope to see you there some day.

Routine

2008-11-19T11:43:00.000-08:00

Wow, has it only been two and a half weeks? Well, to answer my own question "yes." But it also feels much longer. As I was reflecting about why we are as tired as we are I realized that from the first full day we have been here we have been working. We have had two days off so far, but that is changing this week, as we have been allowed to slack a bit. But more importantly, the church has changed a lot in two weeks. Incredible! It is so fortunate for us to have been able to witness progress in a large scale that quickly after we arrived. It has given me personally encouragement and the desire to do more, to make this building look even more beatiful then it is. I know that so often the more subtle changes that go unnoticed are as important or even more important in such things as renovating the church. But it is energizing nonetheless to see big and drastic change.

And it seems that we are slowly starting to work ourselves into a routine, which is nice and important I think. This week we get two days off completely, with two days of work and then today which was meeting+hanging with the Pritzkaus day. To top it all off, we found this store fairly close to were we boys reside which sells so many cool things that it is very hard to not spent money there. It is a craft store, but it has all sorts of neat things, starting with amazing Lego sets to build-it-yourself models of all kinds of things to the cherry that tops it all of which is this: die-cast airplane models. Man, that store is like heaven. So today, upon going there a second time, here is my purchase: A model of a Swissair DC 8-53 that flew with Swissair under registration HB-IDB, and was converted sometime in the sixties from a -32 to -53. Anyways, its a 1:500 model, and it's very detailed. It is painted in classic Swissair livery and it is beautiful. If this piques your interest do look the registration on Google and you will find tons of pics.

Now, to finish this rather uninteresting post of I want to quote out of 2. Corinthians 12:9

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

This verse has popped up a couple times this last week and again today and I find it very appropriate for our team and for myself. I hope that I can continually let God work out of my weaknesses rather then I working out of my strenghts. I realize how we often just try to be strong, or smart, or practical; we all try to be somebody. And yet, God does not ask us to be any of that, he does not ask of us to be something we are not. All he ask of us is that we give everything to him, including our weaknesses that we so often try to hide from this productivity-driven world we live in and let him take care of it. And the promise and often for us the dread is that God will not always use our strenght, but his true power comes in that he uses our weakness. I believe that is harder for us to embrace the we think, and so I will keep on trying and praying and surrendering.

I love tools!!!

2008-11-11T13:15:00.001-08:00

I NEVER KNEW POWERTOOLS WERE THIS MUCH FUN!!!! But they are, let me explain. So, as we have now been relocated from the church to two families (Girls are at the Epp's, Guys at the Warkentin's) I am writting this from our room in what seems to almost be an attic. The space efficiency of the Europeans continues to astound us and makes clear once again that when it comes to any kind of city planning/engineering we are far behind. We love it at our families places and I dont even mind the two hours a day spent on trains getting to the church and back. But back to the tools. The new windows for the church have arrived. No more drafts, no more boarded windows, the church is not a dark cement block anymore, but light is actually shining through the windows right now. And that is where powertools come in. Because in order to get new windows in, old ones have to leave. And guess who gets to help taking them out? US. And its been a lot of fun, we have been smashing glass, carrying heavy windows, setting up sketchy scafolding and many more fun things. Two highlights from today: 1) The garage windows were cemented into place, so I got to use a jackhammer of sorts, coupled with a sledge-hammer to completely demolish these windows. Hard work but tons of fun (yay for powertools that make tons of noise and demolish stuff). 2) Some other windows that we had to take out where welded shut. Whats the solution? Cut through the welds, which was so much fun and created a ton of sparks. It was a good day, needless to say.

Now, beyond the obviously boyish obsession with powertools I seem to have developed over the last 24 hours (unabashedly might I add, seeing as I am a boy and this hence it fits quite nicely with my overall personal profile) there is the visibility of change that is happening. We have only been here a week and somewhat longer, but the church is already our home, and we love it dearly and it is beyond nice to see how its being changed and made more beatiful, how light shining in now in what used to be darkness. And I cannot help but feel that this is the place of this church in the community it is at. Walking around the area one cannot help but feel like the area of Treptow even though now free from communist enclosure, government censorship and many other things has not found real freedom. I have said many times over the last little while that it seems to be an area in bondage. And into that darkness comes this group of Christians who are not just there but who want to change things. Renovating a delapitaded building is one thing, but much more than that this church wants to shine a light into the darkness and open the windows so that God comes in. What a privilege to be just a little part of that. Please also continue to pray for this church, its people and its leadership.

Whose time is it anyway?

2008-11-07T04:47:00.000-08:00

One of my favourite songs, first in German, then translated shabily by me.

Meine Zeit
Meine Zeit, steht in deinen Haenden,
nun kann ich ruhig sein, ruhig sein in dir.
Du gibst Geborgenheit, du kannst alles wenden.
Gib mir ein festes Herz, mach es fest in dir.

1. Vers
Sorgen quaelen, und werden mir zu gross. Mutloss frag’ ich: Was wird morgen sein.
Doch du liebst mich, du laesst mich nicht los. Vater, du wirst bei mir sein.

Meine Zeit, steht in deinen Haenden,
nun kann ich ruhig sein, ruhig sein in dir.
Du gibst Geborgenheit, du kannst alles wenden.
Gib mir ein festes Herz, mach es fest in dir.

2. Vers
Hast und Eile, Zeitnot und Betrieb nehmen mich gefangen, jagen mich.
Herr, ich rufe: Komm and mach mich frei! Fuehre du mich Schritt fuer Schritt.

Meine Zeit, steht in deinen Haenden,
nun kann ich ruhig sein, ruhig sein in dir.
Du gibst Geborgenheit, du kannst alles wenden.
Gib mir ein festes Herz, mach es fest in dir.

3. Vers
Es gibt Tage, die bleibe ohn Sinn. Hilflos seh’ ich, wie die Zeit verrint.
Stunden, Tage, Jahre gehen hin, und ich frag’ wo sie geblieben sind.

Meine Zeit, steht in deinen Haenden,
nun kann ich ruhig sein, ruhig sein in dir.
Du gibst Geborgenheit, du kannst alles wenden.
Gib mir ein festes Herz, mach es fest in dir.All my time, is in your hands,
now I can be still, still in you
You give security, you can change all things.
Give me a steadfast heart, make it firm in you.

My Time

All my time, is in your hands,
now I can be still, still in you
You give security, you can change all things.
Give me a steadfast heart, make it firm in you.

Vers 1
Worries torment, and become to big for me.
Discouraged I ask: What will tomorrow look like?
But you love me, you never let me go.
Father, you will always be with me.

All my time, is in your hands,
now I can be still, still in you
You give security, you can change all things.
Give me a steadfast heart, make it firm in you.

Vers 2
Haste and hurry, busyness and the want of time,
imprison and haunt me. Lord I call out to you: Come and set me free.
Take me and lead me step by step.

All my time, is in your hands,
now I can be still, still in you
You give security, you can change all things.
Give me a steadfast heart, make it firm in you.

Vers 3
There are days that just lack sense and meaning.
Helpless I look on and see the time pass.
Hours, days, years pass by, and I wonder where they have gone.

All my time, is in your hands,
now I can be still, still in you
You give security, you can change all things.
Give me a steadfast heart, make it firm in you.

Ich bin ein Berliner!!! (© John F. Kennedy)

2008-11-04T09:24:00.002-08:00

So, here we are. We finally arrived. After an excruciatingly cramped flight over the ocean, followed by 4 hours at London Heathrow, another 1.5 hour cramped flight to Berlin, and a cramped baggage pick-up lounge we made it to the home of the local missionaries, the Pritzkaus and evenutally to the church yesterday where we are living now. Let me inform you right from the get go that this church is very cool in more ways then one. For starters, its was built by the commies, then used as community center and I believe eventually as a club. Now it is being rebuilt as a church and has undergone massive changes and is yet to undergo many more, some of which we hope to be part of. It is also cool, because its cool - quite literally. The building is dilapidated, most windows dont have glass anymore and are either boarded shut, or covered with sheet metal. Oh, and the most crucial part to any building in a country that has a signifcant temperature drop in the winter is missing... Yes, you guessed it, no heating!!! Now, dont get me wrong, as much as the lack of heat can get to the average person every once in a while (try about every half hour) we are not complaining. I was realizing today as I was looking at the places team Thailand has stayed at and is staying at now that our accomodations are less luxurious and it makes me almost proud. I have seen the numerous looks when I say to people that we are going on missions to Germany. Somehow, as soon as you mention a Western country the less than exotic destination seems to take away from the purpose of what we are trying to do. So here it is, thats the place we live in, and as much as our human desires are often derived from the evident wishes for a warmer climate inside of our living place we are proud of where we are and we love it. A little cold has hurted no one and after all we did not come to live in luxury but to serve on one hand and to participate in the life of this congregation. Needless to say we do have some heaters in our rooms and that is good enough for now.

I was reminded today of little booklet that Gay (our cook/pastor/everything to everybody at TREk training) gave us at the end of training. In it, the author was describing how God is making his home in us. Beeing at this church I am being lead to make a somewhat cheesy, and far fetched analogy, but I feel that God taking up residence with us (John 14) and in us, seems somewhat like us living at this church. In order for him to live with us he has already changed us considerably, but he is not done. And I do believe it can get rather chilly in our hearts at times. But above all, it is God's grace after all that he makes do with what is there already and moves on to make something better and more beautiful. As we see by this church it is hard work for everyone involved, but the end-result is what will matter in the end.

The Prizkaus are talking about moving us out of the church by the end of the week, as new windows are going to be installed, which should eventually lead to a warmer church experience for everyone involved. Part of me is glad, and part of me is wishing we could tough it out and be that kind of people who does not just complain about the place we stay at but that rejoice at the opportunity of not having to sleep outside. Regardless, we will be happy. Today we did some construction, we installed a water heater so we can shower with warm water, we removed screws from the windows and removed some fiberglass. As well, yesterday we explored Germany by going smack-downtown to look for a money exchange place, and today we finally got some monthly passes for the 4-tier public transportation system (let me tell you that North-America could learn from how Europeans do it). Tomorrow we have a meeting to plan out the week. We are so glad to be here and are looking forward to an amazing 7 months in which we hope God will work in, through and with us in all we do.

Phillipians 2:14-15 Do all things without murmuring and arguing, so that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God iwthout blemish in the mids of a crooked and perverse generation, in which you shine like stars in the world.

The last day!!!

2008-10-31T19:02:00.000-07:00

Time is a funny concept. Although it apparently is constant, it is funny how our perception of it changes. In the last two months time has at times moving slow, at times fast, and at times both at the same time (don't ask me how!) And now I am sitting in the great room that is as clean as I have ever seen it. I am sitting with all the people I've grown to love waiting for the first 6 to leave in about an hour. My room is clean, my bags are "packed" and really, all I am waiting for is for my own flight to leave tomorrow in the evening. We had our comissioning service yesterday and it was beautiful, moving and all in all wonderful. And yet, its incredible that the adventure beginns.

Our team verse from 1 Peter 1 starts by exhorting us to prepare for action and for the last two months we have been doing that. In the process I have

- made new friends

- been humbled continually

- made Abbostford a surrogate home

- been surprised by God's incredible provision

- encountered my saviour in new ways

- learned that 19 people in one spot can be very loud

- appreciated the beautiful scenery and learned that the flatness of my home province holds beauty equal to the mountains I see here everyday.

- been challenged to seriously consider missions

- found that there are many Godly people in places where you dont expect them to be.

Above all, come what might, I am ready to go to Berlin. I am going to miss the people, I am going to miss the safety of the Mark Centre, and I am going to miss the safety of having TREK leadership organize, direct, and inspire us. I am scared, but I am excited, and although I have just grown used to being here, I am ready for change, for something new. I am blown away once more at how God has brought all of to this place, to our teams and finally to our countries. God is truly in control, and that fact surpasses all expectations that I might have come with. So, with that I am once more saying good-bye and hello. Good-bye to the new that's now old, and hello to something new again. I go with an amazing team that demonstrates to me continually the grace, power and love of Jesus Christ. And I go with the prayer that the words of Romans 8:5-6 might continually be fullfilled in my life and in that of all these people that I have met here:

Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace.

Romans 8:5-6

Please continue to hold us in prayer, that our minds could indeed by set on what the Spirit desires and that the life and peace of the Spirit of the only one and true God might be poured out in our lives constantly.

I love all of you, and I love to hear from you. Thank you for bearing with my rambles once more, the next one will come to you from East-Berlin, Germany (I wish you could see my grin as I am saying this!!!)

Small group coffee times.

We need prayer!!

2008-10-22T12:41:00.000-07:00

It’s time to raise your prayers and if you have anything else in your power to do, please do so.

1. The visas for the Brazil Team have been rejected with a resounding NO!!!! from the Brazilian consulate. Please pray and intercede for TREK leadership to take the correct actions on this matter; pray for the people at the consulate that God might soften their hearts and minds to not only accept the applications but to also expedite the process; pray for confidence for the Brazil team as their near future is uncertain at this point.

2. At this point not all of the Team Germany members have raised their full support. Please pray that God in his will might call willing givers.

Above all, let us continue to praise the Lord our God for the wonderful things he has already accomplished and worship in the confidence that nothing is above our Triune God who can and does accomplish mighty deeds. Thank you.

Finally an update!!!

2008-10-19T22:50:00.000-07:00

So, here we are. In less than 2 weeks, this place, the MARK Centre will be empty and all of us will have gone to our respective assignments. It is really incredible that its already been almost 2 months since I came here. In 2 months things change so much, and yet so little. I have realized one thing for example. As much as I was looking forward to the opportunity to continue "studying" or in other words, to go to class I am enlightening myself with the fact that indeed, after those 4 years of University, I am looking forward to a well deserved (in my mind at least) break of classroom (in)activity. One thing that in blunt honesty I did not realize would happen was also the fact that I would miss people from Winnipeg as much as I do sometimes (and don't take that as an offence, those who know me will know that that is more a reflection of myself and my character then of yours). But on the other hand, I feel at home here now. I have found my spot, I am getting closer and closer with people - I have always thought that I need a 1 month warm-up period anyways - and I really love the Germany team. I am not finding time to relax and be by myself in quietness as I wish, but that is fine, and I just realized today that my tiredness may in fact stem from a budding cold rather then lack of sleep or introversion. So all in all, things are good.

A couple of verses from Isaiah 55

This is God speaking to us: Everyone who is thirsty, come to the waters; and you that have no money, come, buy and eat...

See, you shall call nations that you do not know, and nations that do not know you shall run to you, because of the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, for he has glorified you...

For as the rain and snow come down from ehaven, and do not return there utni they have watered the arth, making it bring forht and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth, it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and succeed in the thing for which I sent it.

This is beatiful, and its one of my favourite passages right now. God has been teaching me numerous things these weeks, even through my doubts about some of the sessions and about myself and God has had a lot patience. And these words from Isaiah 55 just sum it up so nicely. The title ch. 55 in my Bible (NRSV) is "An Invitation to Abundant Life." How often do we not realize that abundant life starts in faith and moves to proclamation. Abundance is in receiving and sharing that which we have received: "you shall call nations you do not know." Is it not beautiful that we are invited to this abundance, not coerced, not forced; its not about our salvation, but it is a gift that we receive through our salvation. Have you ever considered the fact that sharing and proclaiming is not a responsibility but a privilege, a gift?

I wanted to use that as a lead in to let you in on what we did yesterday. All 19 Trekkers, together with some MTIers (MTI = Missionary Training Institute, MBMSI) spread out over Abbotsford and Aldergrove and we spoke to people, asking them about their faith, filling out surveys and praying that God would give us the opportunity to share with them what we believed in. This was amazing and I am forever going to remember the conversations we had and will definitely keep these people in my prayers. But the question begs, why are we so scared of doing that? Why has this become an obligation for me, almost a dread, rather then a joyful participation in the Kingdom of God? I am not talking about hitting people on the head with the gospel, but how are we ever to fulfill the great commission if we don't have enough faith and to step out and ask others what they believe in and humbly share our believes (I think there is a big difference between sharing and trying to convince, i.e. "convert"). As Phil Harris one of our speakers put it, "to plant a seed. And maybe it is not us that harvest, but others will, that we have to leave up to God"(I do hope you realize I am paraphrasing).

All of this relates to the Lordship of Jesus in our lives, something which from my own experience I tend to minimize at times. But I am encouraged continually to work at it as I read the Bible. I have been reading through 1. Samuel and I am currently at the 12. chapter. Israel is getting a King and Samuel has annointed Saul and yet is lamenting over Israel for they haven chosen to have a King and not to trust in the Lord. Upon hearing this lament, Israel answers in repentance and asks: "Pray to the LORD you God for you servants..." and what has impacted me is Samuel's response: "far be it for me that I shoud SIN against the Lord BY CEASING TO PRAY FOR YOU." You see, even in tough times Samuel is interceding on behalf of his people, not out of his own will, but because to do otherwise would be to sin. This is the kind of faith I strive for and I continually pray that I might be open to God.

Now for some more mundane things, fall in BC is beautiful, for I did not know that trees could turn red. Today we went to Vancouver and saw Stanley Park among other things. The most impressive thing was going to the MEC Gear Swap. People had been sleeping in front of the store all night and even though we had to wait 1.5 hours to get in we still found everyting we needed (and I might add, some things that we bought more out of convenience then necessity). It was a good time and nice to leave Abby for once. Another highlight is the fact hat Team Germany is flying with British Airways, to London Heathrow to the now infamous Terminal 5. For you aviation buffs that might be noteworthy (I have never been to Heathrow!!!). I am so looking forward even to just that part of our experience.

Well, it is late, I am going to bed and I feel that I have ranted more then I should have. I hope that nonetheless this gives you and insight into my life and into TREK, for all you that eligible to participate, I encourage you strongly to consider TREK and for all of you thank you so much for your prayers, they are stronlgy felt over here.

For you shall go out in joy, and be led back in peace; the mountains and the hills before you shall burst into song, and the trees of the fiel shall clap their hands.
Isaiah 55:12

Things are settling down

2008-10-04T21:48:00.000-07:00

Hey there, I thought I would just update this quickly, since I have promised weekly updates. Things here at TREK are settling down into a comfy, albeit at times tiring routine. It seems like we all have found our places and for me personally, especially since finding out our teams. Our topic for this week was "the church" and of course it included the token conflict resolution talk. And included in that was the token personality test, except that this one was different. I have some information for all of you that you would have never guessed about me, I hope you are ready:

I AM BLUE

Hehe, what that means really, is that I, amongst other things, really like when things happen on time, I always check my watch, I like things to be organized, I am no to outgoing nor very directive. Or so it says. Truth be told, I could find myself in some other colours as well. Regardless, I found it very interesting that our team was mostly blue and yellow, and I wont go into further detail, because quite frankly I don't want to bore you or myself.

Needless to say, I loved this week, simply because of the topic itself. I think I might have a new rant forming, but maybe not. Nonetheless, it was tiring which I do not understand. I have had 8 hours + of sleep every night, more then I have had in the last 4 years of my life, and in those 4 years I was attending school full-time, work part-time, and participate in youth and leadership at church. Here I go to classes for sure, but it does not compare to University, and yet I am as tired as I have ever been and I cannot get rid of headaches. When we got here they told us that the lack of rest can become a spiritual thing. Sometimes it makes me wonder why we all are so tired. Anyways...

On Wednesday we went canoeing at Widgeon Creek which was absolutely beautiful. Canoeing in the mountains just does not compare with the Whiteshell. It was a really a good day and it's nice to get outside once in a while. It is so interesting to see how everybody finds their places, literally. Each morning for devotions and scripture memorization we all spread out over the Mark Centre. Each morning when the weather is nice you see people in their spot. There is just something about humans that we look for comfort in something regular, in routine. Anyways, I am very glad to have my spot.

Well, thats all for today, I gotta tell all of you, TREK has been good, and I absolutely, honestly love my team.

We wrote our team covenant this week, and as a guideline we used this verse, and with that I leave you.

How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity! Psalm 133:1

Finally a destination!!!!

2008-09-24T18:02:00.000-07:00

So, for all of you who - like me - have been waiting to know where I am going its official. Let me describe the process first. On Monday night, the TREK Leadership Team came together and started the evening out with prayer. They discussed some details about each of the three locations and then started to write names on the boards under the different countries, until after much prayer everybody was at peace with the decisions made.

Today in the morning we had a worship session. Prior to worship, Luke, the TREK Director wrote all the teams on a little whiteboard, hidden from our eyes. He then turned it around and let all of us see where we were going. Worship started immediately without and opportunity to talk about it. That was the process in short version.

Here is the result:

The Whiteboard turned, and I saw my name at the top of the list which was titled Germany. So, its official, I am on the team that is going to Germany. Not only that, but beside my name was also written these two letters: (TL), which mean Team Leader. To be honest, I had struggled with the idea of leadership and whether or not God wanted me to learn how to submit to others and not be a leader for once. I had surrendered this to God and was pretty confident in the fact that I was not going to be a leader, or at best, I had resolved to try not to care. As we moved into worship I was kind of in shock, and scared (I am still scared, but thats part of the whole thing). As we were worshiping and praying, the Holy Spirit led me back to 3 summers ago, when during my internship in Germany I came in contact with a TREK team, as well as a TREK alumni. I had felt back then the strong desire that God put on my heart, even the calling, that I should go on a TREK team to Germany and be its leader. It is interesting how I had forgotten that, but during worship today, the Holy Spirit brough this back to me and God let me know that this was his plan and that for better or worse, this is where he had placed me.

I had also from early on surrendered my choice of locations, and I had prayed that the God would do as he will. Interestingly these last couple of days I felt more and more that the choice came to either Germany or not Germany. God looked into my heart, and the desires he had put there two years ago, and its amazing how he has led me all the way to this point again. The goodness of God has continually amazed me. It is interesting how sometimes we hear, even though we pretend we don't and how God just patiently rearrranges and makes changes until you finally react to what you are hearing.

Edit:

Here is TEAM GERMANY

Team Verse: Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed. 1 Peter 1:13

Let me finish with the verse that has stuck to me today and this is my earnest prayer, as this is what God has put on my heart is missing in my life:

But the wisdom from above is first pure, the peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without a trace of partiality and hypocrisy. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace for those who make peace.

James 3: 17-18

2008-09-21T14:45:00.000-07:00

There's a wideness in God's mercy
like the wideness of the sea.
There's a kindess in God's justice
which is more than liberty

I am writting this blog coming out of a 48 hour period of complete silence. The topic of this weeks week of training was listening to God's voice. After four sessions in which this topic was explored some more, we entered into a silent retreat. When I speak of silence I speak of the abscence of communication. There were 19 people at the Mark Centre who were trying not to acknowledge the other presence. To some extent it was surreal and to the other extent it was a really good experience to just be together in complete silence. People dont do that enough.

Have you ever wondered if God speaks to you? If you have, join the team, cause I have found myself wondering about the same thing. But I have found that if we really think about and are completely honest with ourselves and God we can say with all confidence that God did indeed speak to us. I was reminded of this once again this week, and it was a really good feeeling. I spent 48 hours in silence and it was amazing how God was just at work in all of us. I personally spent a lot of time in the Bible, going on walks, praying and trying to sleep. I will not share with you some of the amazing things that happened, just to give you a taste it did include Air Traffic Control chatter (I would love to tell you about it when I get back and... STOP LAUGHING, hehe). Anyways, one of the Bible passages that I felt God gave me this during this retreat was from Jeremiah 31:3

I have loved you with an everlasting love, therefore I have continued my faithfullness to you.

How true and wonderful.

Today I went to a new church once again, and I was reminded once again that apparently we are in the land of endless and huge Mennonite churches (although some of the seem to be to scared to be called Mennonite, I wonder how long it will take for "community church" to be become a synonim to "mb church." Sometimes I think we spent to much time on these little things) that often appear more to be more like concert halls or movie theatres. But anyways, the church I went to today has three services, all of the in different worship styles. Some of us went to the liturgical service. Yes, there is such a thing as an MB liturgical church service, and let me tell you it was wonderful. I found it amazing that people of all age came to a liturgical service and shared in this form of worship and truly passionately wanted to meet Jesus. It's interesting how I felt some of the superficiality of other services not present this time. I just really like this service and I will try to go there again as the opportunities present themselves.

In the bulleting at Bakerview MB, one of the topics for next weeks Adult Sunday School is why the US elections are of importance to us. That of course sparked something in my head which will lead to a rant in the very near future, but here is the condensed version. I don't understand why in Canada we care so much about the US elections. I guarantee that a majority of Canadians has heard something about McCain and Obama. However, ask these same people and they will not know that we have an election coming up here in Canada to choose the rulers of our country. What kind of schizophrenic state are we in, that we as Canadians we could not care less who wins the Canadian election. Sure, if we HAVE to vote, I guess we will and we will vote not based on issues but based on the fact that Steven Harper is Christian, as oppossed to the other leaders. But lets please not waste to much time on this, because something of real importance is going on over on the other side of the border, thats where we will spend all our energy on. Sometimes I wonder whether we would not rather be part of the US then continue in this ambiguos game of "I hate everything about the US, except I wish I could be like them." Anyways, that rant is to come.

That my friends is all for today, let me finish with another verse from Frederick W. Faber's "There's a Wideness in God's Mercy"

If our love were but more simple
we would rest upon God's word,
and our lves would be illumined
by the presence of our Lord.

Almost one week

2008-09-13T15:42:00.000-07:00

John 12:23-26

Jesus answered them, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Very truly, I tell you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains just a single grain; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. Those who love their life lose it, and those who hate their life in this world will keep it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must follow me, and where I am, there will my servant be also. Whoever serves me, the Father will honor.

These verses were part of my bible reading yesterday and as I poured over the text and tried to focus, they stuck out to me. Whoever hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life, that to me has been powerful. I have been struggling in this one week of being here with perceived loneliness (as oppossed to actual loneliness), and with just not really feeling a sense of beloning. Perhaps for the first time in my life I actually grieve the absence of friends of routine maybe. I have been dwelling unwillingly on the conflict between feeling like I should somehow always be active with others, and the other hand, just being completely and utterly exhausted by all the action, activity, screaming and laughter all the time. I think what I maybe miss most is the one on one connection with people and that takes time to build. And here is where that verse comes to mind that I just quoted. Not all things we are called to are easy, and they are not always what we like. The expression that comes to mind is "growing pains." Being put out of my comfort zone, where I maybe didnt even expect it to be that uncomfortable is maybe just what I needed. This is where God has chosen to have me for the next year, and this is where I am eing taught over and over again to humble myself, to give up my own pretensions as to my future, to forget that I studied things for 4 years, and to actively and completely work on my faith and on giving everything up to God. Is it hard? Yes, I most definitely feel that it is. And thats where I come back again to that verse. "those who hate their life in this world will keep it for eternal life." I am here to follow God and change those things that he deems need changing. I hope it keeps on being hard, but what I pray for is the joy to keep on changing even when it's really hard.

Now, on Wednesday we went to Whistler. Whistler is beautiful, the drive is excruciating, and the place we stayed at was kind of weird. It was a really good time, however, to do some heavy excercise, but also to just lay around and read and listen to some awesome music. I am discovering classical music all over again, as I have been listening to it a lot lately. Anyways, what sticks out about Whistler is Thursday. Thursday was a day for us to do whatever we wanted to do. Three of us had decided that we wanted to hike, but then found out that there were not real hiking trails, but more walking trails that left the actual townsite of Whistler. We resigned to the fact that we would try to find the most hardcore of these latter trails, however, on Thursday morning another option popped up. We could leave somewhere closer to our retreat centre and hike up to a lake. As we made the decision, our group doubled in size. So, at 11 AM 6 of us started at the Rainbow Lake trailhead. This was one of the most amazing experiences I have had in my life. Not only did I get to know more people, but the hike was long and hard. The roundtrip was about 20 Km, in which we gained 850 meters, and then of course, on the way back lost those meters again. The trail was hard, there were not that many switchbacks and was almost continually slopping upwards. After about 2.5 hours people were almost ready to quit. We had just encountered hikers coming down from the lake who told they had been coming down for almost a half hour (coming down is faster anyways). We had a team meeting and we decided that we couldnt quit now. The goal was almost there. And from what we had heard, the lake was beautiful. That was the best decision ever. The last half hour was brutal, it was hard, and yet we continually told each other that we could do it. It was a team effort and when we reached that lake, we did not regret it. There was a feeling of accomplishment, of relief, and most of all, the fact that we knew that we could stretch ourselves beyond what we thought we could do. I am not going to explain how this can be analogous to what we are doing on a missions trip, one that is so aptly named TREK. Figure it out. It was amazing, pictures will be on facebook.

I get to drive today, which is so sweet, because not having driven for a week now drives me up the wall (hehe, not driving drives me up the wall, I just love it)

I know you guys are all busy, but I'd love to hear from you guys, comment or write an email. Let me finish with another couple of verses

Then Jesus cried aloud: "Whoever believes in me bleives not in me but in him who sent me. And hwoever sees me sees him who sent me. I have come as light into the world, so that eveyone who believes in me should not remain in the darkness"

John 12:44-46

First day(s)

2008-09-08T22:11:00.000-07:00

The B737 slowly turns and and as I look out the window right beside me the snow covered slopes of Mount Baker amaze me as it finally sets in that I have started a new chapter in my life. Its 3:00 PM Pacific time. 15 hours ago I sat at CMU saying good-bye to some of the dearest people in my life. 5 hours ago I was rushing out of church trying to make my flight, hoping that I would not be one of those people that shows up way to late and holds up the flight.

Fast forward a couple of hours and I am finally, finally in Abbotsford. I am one of the first, but many more are still to come. And supper rolls around, all 19 are there. And now comes the curious thing. As I look around I find that I am with the exception of one person, the oldest person participating in TREK. And at this point lonelyness hits for the first time. Not only are some people here 5 years younger then I, but more to the point, they all seem to know each other. Only 4 of us are not from BC, and out of the rest, almost all are from the Frasier Valley, i.e. Abbotsford and Vancouver. There seem to be two cliques. Those who went to MEI and another group of 5 that go to the same church in Vancouver. Far and few between are we that don't seem to know anyone.

And at this point it strikes me and it has several times since then, that for the first time in my limited experience with "missions" I might not be comfortable. I have to remind myself that in fact I am not here for comfort, but rather to be streched and thrust into a place far beyond my comfort zone. That this might be harder then expected should be a given. And I ask myself whether comfort and happiness are necessarily linked. Am I called to be where I am? The answer is definitely YES! And yet, as I sit and think, my own will screams for things to be back as usual 6 months ago, where I was a comfortable student at CMU with lack of any want.

The evening ends with a collective reading of the gospel of Mark. And now I know why I am here. I am not here to be popular. I am not here to be the smartest, or most knowledgeable. I am not here to make a ton of friends, or fill some lonely spot in my heart. I am here for what I always said I was going for (did I lie to myself?), namely, to grow in Christ (1), and to bring Christ to others (2). So, once more, let the adventure begin.

The place were we stay is very, very nice. Tomorrow there is one more day of orientation, followed by a three week retreat in Whistler. All I can say to all you Manitobans is: suckas!! And of course, I miss you all. Thats all for today.